Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

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I saw a Chinese guy and a black guy talking to each other today, it gave me hope... For another rush hour movie

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What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

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There's two men on a subway. One says "Hey, that's my sandwich.".

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Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Knock knock SCREW YOU I BUSY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the girl die? No one knows.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A bad decision because soccer is in their blood

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What's better than winning a medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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chuck norris's tears cure cancer, to bad chuck norris never cries

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A christian was diagnosed with cancer. He refused chemo and prayed to god. Eventually, he died.

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Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? the black baby is black

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Why did the man get thrown out of the cinema? The man began to masturbate. He was also blind.

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What do you call a bunch of Mexicans on fire? Jumping Beans.

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What did the cow say to his friend? Moo.

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Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

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Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

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Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

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Woman's rights

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What did the old man say? Nothing he was so old he died.

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If you challenge the tarsier to a staring contest, it wouldnt undersand a word you say, but it would stare at you when you would think that was apropos. the tarsier wouldnt really think anything and would just make a peepee

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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