An abortionist secretly fancies himself pro life, with reservations. Overwhelmed, and utterly fed up, with the burden of carrying on the family business, he aborts himself. Although he was only 46, his frail mother was nevertheless proud of his decision to succeed where she had failed 46 years ealier.

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Your mom is so black that her skin tone is darker than most people

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Justin Beiber

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Six million.

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a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a bus.

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My mother-in-law is so fat that I sometimes worry my wife will look just like her after she gives birth.

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How many dislikes can this get?

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Friends are like penguins because when you throw a polar bear at them they die

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

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Why did the boy go to heaven? He was in an airplane.

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What has wings and flies at night? A black man with wings

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Why did the vegetarian lose her foot? Diabetes.

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I can't stand 9/11 jokes Their just plane wrong!

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch." It was an Iron bar.

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why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

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when Bonquisha and Letroy had a baby girl what did they name her? Courtney.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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A guys walks up to a drug dealing looking to score some drugs. The deal was made an the man quickly arrested the drug dealer because he was actually a undercover cop

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Why did the old man fall off a bicycle? He had a fridge thrown at him.

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A man walks into a bar, unfortunately his brain condition killed him after the swelling in his brain reached a point where his family had to unplug him from a machine putting him in a medically induced coma.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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