Waiter, waiter! There's a fly in my soup! Apologies for the inconvenience sir, I shall bring you a new bowl as soon as possible.

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Why did the dad buy his son some ice cream? He didnt, his dad is dead

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A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

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Two guys walk into the woods an saw a naked lady.One guys ran away. When his friend met up with him he ask why did u run away. He siad "my mom said if i a naked lady that i would turn to stone and i felt myself getting hard."

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

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Children playing GTA......... what a world of rapists

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What was Helen Keller book called Bsnshsiengwkaisg

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what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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what did the lion say to the zebra? roar!

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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A Blonde, a Brunette, and a Red head were on a plane. They never met, and went their separate ways.

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what's worse then being dumped? NOTHING

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Hellooooo whos there? Its me fred Fred? A Canadian

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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What is the biggest lie in the universe? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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"Knock Knock" "Whos there?" "Its Adolf, we're going to camp."

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An indian boy gets a girlfriend

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Hey man have you ever seen Stevie Wonders house? ... Neither has he

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-How old are you, Dick? -I'm 30 centimeters old

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What did the prostitute eat for lunch? Nothing because she was too busy performing oral sex for money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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