Matt Damon

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An owl turns to the other owl. He has to, he can't move his eyes.

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What does an Irishman order at the bar?? A beer

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, animals can't talk.

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? names

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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Why didn't the boy buy his mom a gift for Christmas? He was killed by a drunk driver two years ago

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Dick spice

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Roses are red Violets are blue this poem makes no sense Potato

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ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

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A boat drowns in the middle of the water. Everyone dies except for an Asian guy. Why did he live? Because he could swim.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

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Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

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What time is it? Actually, that sentence is grammatically wrong: what is IT?

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Do you want to hear the best joke ever? Me too!

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There is a man with the surname of Westmoreland. This is a terrible name.

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What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

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What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stappled to the chicken.

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There are two fish in a bathtub. One turns to the other and says "Could you please pass the soap?" The other one says "What do I look like to you, a typewriter?"

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What can Harry Potter NOT see with his glasses? His parents...alive.

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Q. How is a monkey like a tricycle? A. They both have handlebars... except for the monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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