A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

Your mama's so fat that she has type 2 diabetes.

When I was a kid, I had a clown at my birthday party. He molested me. Later I found out the clown was my dad.

What's brown and sticky? Shit.

Friend: I hope you burn in hell -.- Me: I hope you step on a leggo in the dark Friend: *gasp* take that back

What's better than getting to sleep in? Sex for the very first time.

Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

Q: What is a duck's favorite thing to smoke? A: Quack

A blind man walks into a bar

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

Christopher Walken to a bar.

Penis.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Being a jew in the Holocaust.

why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

What is green and red and spins around? A frog in a blender

Whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer.

Waseem is not a funny guy!

How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

What is Bigfoots favorite food? Biscuits and Gravy.

Gadaffi

women have rights

democracy

what do you call a kid without arms and legs? names

A guy comes to a doctor and says: - Doctor, lately I'm having this dream where I kill my father and rape my mother. What does it mean? - Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...