Q: How many apples grow on a tree? A: All of them

what's famous and sounds like a type of food? a famous artist's name slightly modified to include the name of a food

a dyslexic man can't spell a word, don't judge him

A man walks into a bar and walks up to the counter. The bartender looks the man up and down and asks "Can I help you?" "Ya, get this guy off my ass" the duck promptly replies.

Three men walk into a Bar.... You'd have thought at least one of them would have seen it !

Once upon a time, there was a man named John. John loved pancakes

What do you call a black person pushing a car? A very strong human being.

Why did the retarded man jump off a building to commit suicide? He didn't try to commit suicide. He was mentally retarted and didn't know any better.

What do you call a man with no body, just a nose? Nobody Knows.

what did the kid say when he could not find his shoe? wheres my shoe?

Poverty.

whats red, white, and blue? idk go ask the president

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Anything you want, it's only a fish.

So a bear walks into a bar. Everyone in there goes hysterical with the fright. Two people are killed by it.

Rock, paper, scissors, ebola

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: slightly aged post it note glue

A duck walks into a bar and asks the bartender "one beer please." the bartender proceeds to go into shock as a duck just talked to him

What's really ugly and smells like a hampster? My hampster.

Guess what happened when a man took off his jumper?? He became cold!

y do churches have kneelers?, cuz it puts less stain on ur knees

Why does the little boy play video games all the time? Because he is socially awkward and has no friends.

Why did the autistic man cross the road? He was also depressed. It was a highway.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...