How did the gymnast fall off the beam? Got shot in the face

Whats stupid and has words? THIS JOKE!

y do churches have kneelers?, cuz it puts less stain on ur knees

Why does the little boy play video games all the time? Because he is socially awkward and has no friends.

Why did the retarded man jump off a building to commit suicide? He didn't try to commit suicide. He was mentally retarted and didn't know any better.

Rock, paper, scissors, ebola

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a pair of shoes and gloves

What's a tissue's favorite kind of music? Nothing, tissue's do not have ear canals or ear drums and there for cannot hear any type of sound wave.

What do you call a man with no body, just a nose? Nobody Knows.

what did the kid say when he could not find his shoe? wheres my shoe?

How can you tell which kids belong to Dolly Parton? From the strech marks on their lips :|

Q: How many apples grow on a tree? A: All of them

So a bear walks into a bar. Everyone in there goes hysterical with the fright. Two people are killed by it.

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

What did the man do after he found out his wife died in the Titanic? He cried.

a dyslexic man can't spell a word, don't judge him

mooooh im a cow

what do you call a girl who sells sex for money? sally

Once upon a time, there was a man named John. John loved pancakes

What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

What do you call a kid with headgear and one leg? Names.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

I used to write letters to Black people, then I got an arrow to the knee.

What's brown and sticky? Poop

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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