Can Helen Keller keep a secret? No, she didn't hear it in the first place

Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

Ill wait for you as long as you need Nero, I am just so glad you are alive and well... I know you, you would not be this chatty unless you where doing far worse, I know you will recover, dont think about the time for my sake, ill refresh this page every five minutes or so.

Two Atheists walk into a bar. A nearby Christian notices this fact and proceeds to slightly preach to both of the Atheists. They then kindly explain that they don't personally believe in God, but respect the Christian's opinion. They all order drinks, and become very close friends, engaging in a long, hateless conversation.

D is for diabetes, Cookie Monster, if you keep this up.

Knock Knock Come in

Two women were sitting together, quietly.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

Why didn't the 34 year old woman fit into some size 14 jeans? Because she was size 16.

whats yellow sticky and smelly? I dont know i was asking you

Why cant little billy jump? He was aborted.

What's worse than having a bad hair day? Vietnam.

Q: Whats better than getting raped by a dog? A: Getting raped by a cat.

Moral Man Solid V: The Pain Phantom.

why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

Being a demigod and slaying monsters isn't normal, but on myth it is. MYTH: Not even once.

I said I read te terms of service. I didnt

a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

Dislike this

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...