According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.

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8

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Why did the bunny eat his food

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two guys are waiting at a train station...6 hours later one guy turns to the other and says "train aint coming"

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Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

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See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

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A: ask me if I'm a truck. B: why? A: just ask me. B: are you a truck? A: no.

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What did the black man do with the piece of bacon? He ate it.

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Twisty Snake bite: Doctors office. Patient: Err Doc, a snake bit me in the err, private area... Doctor: I must suck out the poison immediately! Patient: What? Man! Are you sick? How do I even know if the snake was poisonous? Besides they only do that crap in bad jokes! Doctor: Yeah but this is an anti joke so drop em! Later at home: Wife: So did the Doctor help you dear? Patient: Worst doctor ever, he really sucked!

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how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

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69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *goes crazy and shoots himself*

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Why did the chiocken cross the road? There's no such thing as a chiocken.

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What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

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Bin Laden comes out of a cave

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Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

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what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

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How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

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What happens when you stab a black man? An equal race rights protest.

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That moment where the screen shouts "HE MAN" And you look at the guy and go... Hmm did they say He-Man or She-Man? HE MAN!

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''Levi Johnston is running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Ironically, many of the babies he'll kiss on the campaign trail will be his own.''

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Penis.

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How did the chicken cross the road? By foot.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops