Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it had no legs. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because its not suppost to be in the tree. Why did susy fall off her bike? Because she was hit by 2 monkeys and a refrigerator!

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What is white, wet, sticky, and gets squished out? Glue obviously, wait.... What were you thinking of?

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why didnt you take a shower? because my house burnt down

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What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

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Why did the Mexican put away the Marijuana? Because he was a Police Officer

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didnt have arms

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What did the man do with his bread He ate it

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Why did the fat kid break his leg? He got hit by a car

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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PENlS.

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Q: What's funnier than 24? A: 25.

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A blind man accidentally walks into another man whilst walking along a sidewalk. The man yells at the blind man, "Watch where you're going!" He then apologizes for his rude behaviour, not noticing right away he was in fact, blind. To show how truthfully sorry he was he took him out for beers the following evening. Soon after they became close friends and now share an apartment in Denver, Colorado.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy i suck at rhyming door knob

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-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

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why was six afraid of seven? cause seven raped and pillaged eight's family.

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How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

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i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

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Why was the puppy sad? It was burning alive

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What did Lindsay Lohan wear to her birthday dinner? -An Orange jumpsuit.

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How do you confuse a blonde? You tell em a AntiJoke!

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"Up to 50% off."

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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