What's worse than getting one of your hands cut off? Getting both of your hands cut off.

A fish swims up stream for his anual spawning season The fish dies from a heart attack because of the rigorous that took place.

Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

Jake Bowar

Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

People tell me im insane. Its all a conspiracy.

How do you get a baby in a blender? Feet first so you can see the expression on it's face. How do you get it out ? Nacho chips!

whats worse than not getting what you want for christmas? a child melester

Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

Q: What do you call a plane with no wings? A: An unfinished plane.

Why was the black man escorted out of the bar? Civil rights is still a real issue in this country and must be solved.

Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

what did the cheese say to the wall? nothing cheese can't talk.

A man was walking on the sidewalk until he saw a bird. He said, "Is that a bird?", and it was a bird.

A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

why did the cookie go to the docter he felt crumpie

nick biggs ate a car well his name is nick BIGGS

What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory? Quality control or some other function.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish you were here, To get to the other side!

How do you know if it's to late to turn your homework in? When the time allotted is up.

how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

Why are black people so tall ? Genetics. duh.

What do you call a black guy who flies an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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