Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he was angry and frustrated with the people in his life, and the ringing clock was the first thing he noticed in his depressed rage.

Why did the blind man cross the road? To end the suffering of a lifetime illness.

How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch-n-sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

Why did the chicken cross the road? -because chickens have a free ability to walk and this chicken felt the urge to walk across the road. Why not?

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

What do you call an amazing, funny, beautiful, nice, goreous, stunning girl? Adena Gabrysiak <3

A bear walks into a bar. Four people were taken to the hospital and there was one fatality.

What's the difference between a computer and a television?

I used to be an inventor, but I had other ideas.

Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

why is nick a dumb ass? because hes not a smart ass

What happen to the boy who poured water on his head? He got wet.

What did the 3 bears say when they saw goldielocks sleeping in their bed? Nothing. Bears can't talk so they ate her.

What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt Getting stabbed.

Knock knock Who's there? I don't know go check.

What happened to the man that took too much viagra? His erection lasted longer than 4 hours, he's dead now

roses are red violets are blue however some roses are pink

What did the man say to the bartender when he wanted a beer? Get me a beer.

A married man, just realizes that his wife is cheating on him while he's away. But just to make sure, he goes into a spy shop to look for a camera to look in on his wife while he's not there. so he goes up to the shop keeper and asks " do you have any video camera's that record in on any place in a house?" the shop keeper says no and the man walks out of the store.

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

What has two feet and cant walk? a cripple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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