A bass player walks past a bar.......... "hey, it could happen"...

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Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

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whats cheese thats not yours? the one in the toilet.

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I'm not here.

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what do you call a black pilot? a pilot

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Why was there a lion in the bathroom? Because I threw a refrigerator at it and stapled a frog to its butthole, all while it was being chased by a 10 foot scorpion and a purple salmon that only had 1 eye.

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y momma so fat that she's heavy

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4/20.

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biggest lie in the world. I love you grandma.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

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Q: What would you do for a Klondike bar? A: I would make the slightly onerous journey to the local grocery establishment and pay my hard-earned money to procure a dessert which I quite enjoy.

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why did the chicken cross the road. why? because he felt like it

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Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? Because they are delicious, and very filling.

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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Why did the eighty year old man climb into a fridge? Because he wanted to.

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What's worse than biting into your apple and realising it has a worm in it? subsequently realising that the worm is a Swamp Adder, the worlds smallest venemous snake. Then you look up and realise you're in the Sahara Desert. You wonder where the snake came from and how it got in the apple.. Then you slowly die.

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3 jews sits in a car. Who drives? Not Hitler.

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Why did Hitler like his steak well done? Because like many people, he didn't like the sight of blood in his steaks.

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whats the difference between a cat and a rooster? who the hell cares, all black people should die

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Darude - Sandstorm

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What did the hot rod say to the other hot rod Its hot in here

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Your momma so fat she's fat

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what makes margaritas good. illegal immagrants in the basement.

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough it was car. The End

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops