Why does an elephant lay on it's back with its feet in the air? To trip birds.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Cancer

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first one.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

What's worse than losing your phone? Getting raped anal until phones fall out

a horse walks into a bar except it wasn't a horse it was Sarah Jessica Parker

Why did the all the fish in the lake die? A pesticide bioaccumulated through the food chain.

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from a sky-scraper Q:he dies

A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

yo mamas so ugly she turned madoosa into stone

I am Skaldak!

a atheist and a christian walk into a bar, they are good friends and enjoy their conversations.

there was a blond, a brunette, and a redhead at the edge of a cliff The blond being stupid jumped off the cliff and broke every bone in her body

A pregnant woman goes to the hospital to deliver a baby. It is born perfectly normal and healthy, the doctor looks at the mother and father offering them congratulations as he hands them a 9 lb 10 oz baby boy. The mother wanted a girl, but she instead develops post part em depression. She goes through years of psychotherapy to again become well adjusted, her second child is a girl.

What do you call it when 1 person has an imaginary friend? A mental disorder. What do you call it when 1 billion people have an imaginary friend? A Religion.

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Why was the swing in the kitchen?

Oh hot damn, this is my jam. Strawberry, to be specific.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

ur gay and this joke sucks

What do you do if Zombies are chasing you and your friend? Trip the friend.

What do you get when you cross a polar bear and a vampire? A Vampire Polar Bear.

What was the sadest part about the four blacks who drove off a cliff in a cadilac? -The car sat five

Q:How many prostitutes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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