What do you get when you cross a cat with a giraffe? A genetically unstable animal that dies shortly after birth.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

What do you get when you cross a Shake Weight with Parkinson's Disease? You get a sentence that doesn't explain the end of the joke and leaves you without any closure.

A woman walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink The bartenders says no, because she is a woman, and he is a sexist Women are still not equally treated in this world

What's better than a pile of dead babies? Anything.

What Do You Call A Man On Land With No Arms And Legs? Useless

Why did the black guy fail his math test? Because he did not study enough and as a result was no prepared to take a test on that material.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? Lick his dog's penis.

A:what happens when you throw a black guy down from a sky-scraper Q:he dies

What do you call a dead cat on the side of the road? Kitty litter

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Q:How many prostitutes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Two

Why does an elephant lay on it's back with its feet in the air? To trip birds.

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

A horse walks into a bar... it was accompanied by a blind man for it was a seeing eye pony and the bartender who was not tolerant to blind people turned away the man causing him to recieve dirty glances from the kindly patrons of the bar.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

waiter: can I get you something to drink? customer: I'll have a coke. waiter: is pepsi okay? customer: is monopoly money okay?

Yo mamma's so black, and that's ok. We're all different and unique.

Mel Gibson is awoken by the ringing of his telephone he proceeds to have a nice conversation with his wife.

Why doesn't Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesn't float!

What's worse than losing your phone? Getting raped anal until phones fall out

Your momma so fat she's fat

Why did the blond crave hotdogs for breakfast? She was likely suffering a sodium deficiency from violently throwing up the night before.

Why didn't the boy respond to the text? His phone had run out of charge.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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