Q:what do you call a black bunny with five eyes? A: i don't know I have never heard of such a thing

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Wait your turn patiently.

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F@ck me in the ass until I say STOP. Before we start, can you please ducktape my mouth?

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An owl and a squirrel were sitting in a tree, watching a farmer. The squirrel turns to the bird and says nothing because squirrels can't talk, and the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

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Why didn't the [any object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. Why didn't the [other object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. [repeat ad infinitum]

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They are both are fat and have beards, except for Tom Cruise.

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Your Mother is so stupid that not only can she not peform basic mathematical sums, but she frequantly makes spelling errors

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What did one Pokemon say to the other pokemon? We are fake.

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Why doesnt mexico have an olympic team? Because all the mesicans that can run, jump, and swim are already in the U.S.

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I went seal clubbing the other day but as I was the only one with legs, the dancefloor was quite lonely

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Q: What has one eye but cannot see? A: A blind cyclops

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Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: A serial killer B: I don't feel comfortable opening the door

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What do you call a plane full of Arab guys? Something not so good.

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What did one dolphin say to the other? Nothing. It was dead.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 new what 6 and 9 were doing.....

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Why was the man tired at his soccer game? Because he did not sleep well the night before

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What's worse than 4 black guys sitting in a Jeep that goes over a cliff? They were my friends.

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How many muslims does it take to screw in a lightbulb. One.

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If Mormonism is true, and Mitt Romney becomes a god, what will that make him? Romniopotent.

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A man walks into a bar. He meets this attractive female. They later go to his house to have sexual intercourse. However, the man forgot to use a condom. He finds out he got AIDS. He dies twenty years later from his sexually transmitted disease.

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Batman and Robin are about to get into the Batmobile. What does Batman say? "Get in the car Robin."

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A dead guy laying on the floor holding a gun and a knife. What killed him? cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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