What did the cat say to the dog? "Meow."

Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

How do you determine the population of mexico? Send out a census every 4 years.

What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Cadaliac? That was my Cadaliac

Japan called... They need help.

Roses are red, Violets are pencil, this poem makes no sense, refrigerator

democracy

How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

Penis-Pump

Why is amouse afraid of cheese? Because they usually die when they get it

How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

A black man, an Asian man, and a white man are stranded in the wilderness after their plane crashed. The black man has a flashlight, the Asian a bottle of water, and the white man a can of beans. They put their racial differences aside to increase chance of survival but were eaten by a pack of coyotes.

69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *goes crazy and shoots himself*

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? -Hey! Where's my tractor?

What did dean carmon say to his brother? - I don't know I'm not his brother

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

How do you make a clown cry? You kill his family and chop off his legs.

what did the boy from a computer recycling unit in china get on his birthday? Pancreatic cancer.

Why do Jews make sure their cars can stop on a dime? So if something happens unexpectedly when they are driving they have a better chance of avoiding a dangerous collision.

Chuck Norris Isn't That tuff if he was he would come to my house and slam my head in they keyboaredehfiu;qbg;qebnuighqije9qp8ubwrsijpa

whats worse than your brother dying in a car accident? finding out the rest of your family was in there

Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

How do you get a giraffe in a fridge? Open the Door, put the giraffe in, close the door How do you get an elephant in a fridge Open the door, take the giraffe out, put the elephant in, close the door There is an animal meeting, one animal doesn't show up. Which animal didn't come? The Elephant, it's still in the fridge You come across a crocodile infested river, how do you get across? You swim across, the crocodiles are at the meeting, Weren't you listening?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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