T-Dog scare me

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What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have herpes. If I were you I would get tested.

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A. Wanna Hear a funny joke? B. Yes! A. The WNBA.

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What's red and creeps up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt. He actually got halfway across the road and was struck by a fast moving car. There is now a memorial on the side of the road mourning his death...

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!" The other bar patrons ask him what is wrong, to which he replies, "I stubbed my toe."

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Whats Black and hangs from a tree? A Tire(:

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A man walks into a bar, unfortunately his brain condition killed him after the swelling in his brain reached a point where his family had to unplug him from a machine putting him in a medically induced coma.

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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Roses are red violets are blue you're the middle child no one cares about you

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what's faster than a snail? Usain Bolt

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Why did the Nigger fuck shit? He was a shit fucking Nigger.

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Knock! Knock! Whose there? Chris Chris who? (There was never a response. Leaving the man to wonder who Chris was... Was it his high school buddy Chris? His former colleague? That guy who filled his propane tank down at the gas station? Was that guy's name even Chris-or was it Craig? Craig, it was definitely Craig.)

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Why does World of Warcraft advertise on Anti-Joke? Because World of Warcraft is funny in anticlimactic and alternative way

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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ha.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had alopecia.

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What do you call an unexpected pregnancy? A defective condom.

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Whats worse then a pile of dead babies? One live baby at the bottom, eating its way out.

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What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

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What does a bug do in a telephone booth? Eats yogurt.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Me.

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What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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