. Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned.

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I told a woman to make me a turkey sandwich. Of course she complied since I was at Subway.

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My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

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dumbledore says,"today we will learn new spells,any questions?" a student says,"are you serious?" dumbledore says,"no he is in jail for a crime he didn't commit,sort of like the a-team."

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A bar walks into a bar, it is then you realize you are in an alternate dimension.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

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Women's rights.

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What do you call a Mexican baptism? A blessed occasion.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

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Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

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Q:why do bananas where sunscreen? A:beacause they peel!!haha

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A fish swims into a wall. Says dam.

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Since little kids sleep with stuffed bears, do bears sleep with stuffed humans?

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Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

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The Holocaust

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What is the biggest lie in the universe? I love you.

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RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

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How does Michael J. Fox like his Martini? With an Olive

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Why couldn't JImmy walk to school? A:Jimmy is in a wheelchair.

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

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What do Asians eat for dinner? Home cooked meals

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What did the racist slave owner do when his slave refused to complete his task? Asked him nicely until the task was completed.

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Why did the man not make any change at his job? Because he is Barack Obama.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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