Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkled? Because if they were small, white, and round they'd be called aspirin.

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Why cant Hellen Keller Drive? Because shes a women.

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The lemons on the tree are ripe. They will be picked.

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What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly,

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why cant sophie lifeguard safely because she cant swim that good

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a muslim, jew, and catholic went into a bar and sat down and had drinks. The muslim asks the jew "are you macrobiotic". the jew replies "no" and they go about their fun....

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How do black people gain access to houses? Through the front door.

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why couldnt the gay man marry??? cause he was dead.

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Why is Ellen so funny? Because she is a comedian.

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Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

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Two muffins are in an oven, when one muffin says to the other "its hot in here." The other muffin then says, "whoa! a talking muffin!"

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what's red and fluffy ... red fluff

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Neither do they

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What did the burn victim get for Christmas? A book of matches

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an apple and slicing your mouth on a razorblade

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Paul Dylan King!

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What is worse than being ran over by a bus? Nothing really.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sitting on your couch? My brother.

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How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

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How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

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Why was Superman white? Because Jerry Siegel is a racist.

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What's worse than finding your dad's wedding ring while fingering your sister ? 3 bee stings.

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Women's sports.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops