How do you wake up lady gaga? You poker face.

How Do You Get Your Mom To Shut up? You Kill Her.

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Susie has Autism

What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

Why don't Mexicans sneak back across the border? Because there are more opportunities and free stuff here. Why would they want to leave, especially at the risk of getting caught for crossing in a sneaky fashion?

How did the chicken cross the road? He went to the crosswalk so all the cars had to stop for him.

A pregnant woman is about to deliver. Both she and her husband are very excited about their first child being born. Then, it turn out that their baby has a rare deformation and has no limbs at all. They still love him

What do you call a deer with no eyes? I don't Know, but we should inform the RSPCA.

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

Why did the Israeli military stop the helicopter raids to Gaza? They didn't. They continue them until there is nobody left.

What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

A baby seal walks into a club...

What's better than winning a medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

Flab

Why was Sally a bad driver? Because she rarely signals and never checked her blind spots.

Two rabbits are being chased by dogs and hide in a log in the forest. The male pushes the female to the dogs which are at both sides of the log and gets off Scott free.

A scottish and a mexican were walking on the streets when the mexican got hit by a car. The scottish man called the ambulance and walkked away.

What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

Who wakes up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy? P. Diddy.

Why did Tommy get a wedgie? He was gay, and his parens were dead, so the school bully,decided to wedge his underwear up his butt.

K

Why couldn't sally drive her car? Because sally is a girl.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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