I ate a pancake for breakfast not

What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

Why did the Jew pick a dollar off the ground? He dropped it.

I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

call of duty is how they say it, calla duty is how we say it...

Not at all, I find your perception of things like that quite pleasing, you obviously care about me, and care about your wife, that's nice.

What's hard and straight going in, and soft and sticky coming out? chewing gum

Knock Knock Who's There? Ram My Penis Into Ram My Penis Into Who? Me.

A duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said the the man running the stand hey ba ba ba got any grapes? the man said no but i got some shut the F*CK up!

Why did the boy hate his bicycle and soccer ball he got for Christmas? The boy didn't have legs. He also hated sports. By the way he was black but that doesn't matter, he still hated sports. Who in the right mind would give a cripple inappropriate toys? Probably a racist Santa Claus. Oh by the way, Santa Claus is not real. So did they return the presents after the boy found out what it was? Yes, and it turns out the boy got a guitar and piano instead. Too bad the boy is also deaf.

Why is Justin beaber so white? Because his mother and father both are.

Why Was my mommy gone last night? -cause I ****ed her

Why do people play video games? Because audio games are not as fun.

What is worse than hell?

What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. To get to the other side.

I'm not wearing any underwear. Why? Because I am have built in underwear. ;)

Me: do u you want to here a joke You: ya Me: Woman's rights

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

Abraham Lincoln was the 16th Presient of the United States of America. The president to follow him was Andrew Johnson, president number 17.

What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

Why did Sally drink water? Because she wanted to take pills and kill herself.

weiner? balls

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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