two guys are waiting at a train station...6 hours later one guy turns to the other and says "train aint coming"

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Yourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr soo uglyyyyyy

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

crime in multi story is wrong on so many levels!

thumb_up thumb_down +40

So I was talking dirty to this deaf chick right...She didn't hear me.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the black father say to his daughter? you're adopted

thumb_up thumb_down +36

If there are 3 black men as passengers in a car, who is driving? The person who is operating the vehicle.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Whats green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree you'll die? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did the pornstar say to the priest? i DO porn

thumb_up thumb_down +34

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? 1

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's the difference between Kim kardashian and lebrOn James?? Kim got a ring this year

thumb_up thumb_down +32

what did the ruler say to the other ruler your a ruler

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What's worse than your mother dying in a car crash? Your father dying in the same crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

no u

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Guy 1: there is this really funny knock knock joke. Ok you start. Guy 2: knock knock Guy 1: who's there Guy 2: umm what? I don't know

thumb_up thumb_down +30

One night you tell your mom to make you a sandwich, the next day in school you ate a delicious peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch

thumb_up thumb_down +30

First kid: my name is bob second kid: ok First kid: Now tell me what my name is?? second kid: bob First kid: HOW did you know???

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? A watermelon is edible.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

how do u get a nun off the bottom of a cruise ship you untie her

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops