what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

thumb_up thumb_down +43

How can you tell if a Mexican's gay? Ask politely.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What did the finger say to the thumb? Nothing, fingers can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Do is the Most Famous Line on youtube Answer- Do the Flop

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Knock knock. Who's there? Becca. I just found out i have aids, so you should probably get yourself checked out.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs in a pool? A: A man with no arms or legs in a pool.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A black man, an Asian man, and a white man are stranded in the wilderness after their plane crashed. The black man has a flashlight, the Asian a bottle of water, and the white man a can of beans. They put their racial differences aside to increase chance of survival but were eaten by a pack of coyotes.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call a Mexican who gets shot on a golf course? A tragic incident.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A really hot girl walks past 2 guys and the following conversation is produced... Guy1:damn! look at that ass! Guy2:yep I bet shit comes from that thing! When's the last time she had diarrhea?!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings. whats worse than 2 bee stings? 3 beestings

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

There are two fish in a bathtub. One turns to the other and says "Could you please pass the soap?" The other one says "What do I look like to you, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats worse than getting mugged? Getting mugged twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops