what do you call a bear on a unicycle? improbable.

Why is the world round? The early earth was molten, and a liquid in a vacuum subject only to its own gravitational forces will assume the shape of a sphere. Gases will behave in the same manner. The effects of the sun and other planets, plus the rotational effect have caused the earth to assume a round shape.

You throw nothing like your mother; she is actually really good at throwing.

A pregnant women walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender denies her service because she is under the legal age.

Why did the elephant cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

Q: why did the little girl cry on Christmas? A: because she got a dead cat.

what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

Want to see a funny movie? -Watch Schindler's List

Why did the dad buy his son some ice cream? He didnt, his dad is dead

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

What did the gay man order at Starbucks? Delicious, handcrafted beverages and great-tasting food. The secret to making life better.

Q: Has your ear operation had success? A: Hotdog with chili.

How do you kill a blond wearing a hat? Shoot her in the face.

Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the immigrants.

Who's the cutest girl in the world? Claire Seiter.

If u and I jumped off a cliff..who would land first? who cares..

What did the fox say to the blonde? "Hello". The girl then captured the fox and sold it to the government.

a man walked out of church and said F***!

Mommy, where do babies come from? In biology, sex is a process of combining and mixing genetic traits, often resulting in the specialization of organisms into a male or female variety (each known as a sex). Sexual reproduction involves combining specialized cells (gametes) to form offspring that inherit traits from both parents. Gametes can be identical in form and function (known as isogametes), but in many cases an asymmetry has evolved such that two sex-specific types of gametes (heterogametes) exist: male gametes are small, motile, and optimized to transport their genetic information over a distance, while female gametes are large, non-motile and contain the nutrients necessary for the early development of the young organism. An organism's sex is defined by the gametes it produces: males produce male gametes (spermatozoa, or sperm) while females produce female gametes (ova, or egg cells); individual organisms which produce both male and female gametes are termed hermaphroditic. Frequently, physical differences are associated with the different sexes of an organism; these sexual dimorphisms can reflect the different reproductive pressures the sexes experience. Thanks mommy

What is black but also yellow? A song.

I only like NY as a friend.

What is brown and sticky? A masturbating Negro.

whats sad about a jew in a gas tank? nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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