- Anti Joke

Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

What is blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint!

What's worse than locking your keys in ur at outside of an abortion clinic? Going in side and asking for a coat hanger!!

Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

One jew, three Canadians and a Dutch man walk into the bar. The jew buys a beer for the Dutch guy, then the Dutch guy responds with.. "Thank you."

Q:Whats funny? A:Genocide

What did the farmer say when he lost his pig? Wheres my Pig?

What's hard and straight going in, and soft and sticky coming out? chewing gum

There are four types of people in this world. I never said I would name them all

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What is worse than peeling a orange that is chasing a dog with raining men? Meeting johnny appleseed

Why did the lizard turn blue? He was low on oxygen.

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whats a worse movie than saw I don't know my mom won't let me watch any

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

That long? I was thinking more like two hours? An hour?

How many girls does it take to sell out a Justin Beiber concert? None, all of them are boys.

what do you do when you see a 40 ft tall gorilla? WHO CARES, RUN!

Whats worse that biting into an apple with a worm in it? The Holocaust.

- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

Star Wars

Two Jewish kids walked into a bar... mitzvot.

What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

What happened when the roof fell on a young boy? Nothing. He was an orphan.

Why couldn't the little boy find his friend in hide and go seek He was blind