Ask me if I´m an orange. Are you an orange? No I? a person.

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Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

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What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A person with light, yellowish hair who has a tragic genetic deformity.

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an apple and slicing your mouth on a razorblade

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What's the same between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What's the difference between a Jew and Hitler? Well, I asked you so I don't know why you said "what?".

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Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

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What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? It didn't. It got hit by a car.

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When was Timothy born? He wasn't.

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What did the boy do when he was cold? Got a blanket.

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What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

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How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

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What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

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Knock knock! Who's there? This. This who? This joke.

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John:Why couldn't the T-Rex clay his hands? Billy:Because his arms are too small! John:no he's extinct dumbass

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Why did the blind man commit suicide? Cause his wife was so ugly he went blind and become depressed a shot himself...twice.

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What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Cadaliac? That was my Cadaliac

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What walks on four legs in the morning, two in the afternoon, and one in the evening? A dog that plays in traffic all day.

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A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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