Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the chicken fall off the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

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Why did the man drop his glasses? His hand was sweaty.

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two muffins are in an oven one muffin says man its pretty hot in here and the other muffin says oh my god a talking muffin

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

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what do you get when you cross a pig with a bunny? Nothing.Crossing a pig with a bunny is impossible.

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What did the poor guy get for christmas? The homeless guy.

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Whats better than the holocaust. Darfur

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Make his family cry!!!!!!!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interrupting doct- You have cancer.

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Why do white people wear black shirts? Why do black people wear white shirts?

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What wears a white robe and shines? A special boar.

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why did the child go to school? Because he wants to succeed in life

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? I don't know, I don't look when he bends over because I don't like him like that. He's just a friend, that's all.

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

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What rhymes with turtle? Rape

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whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

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A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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