Why doesnt mexico have an olympic team? Because all the mesicans that can run, jump, and swim are already in the U.S.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

what did the homeless man get for christmas? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What does the latin maid does when I tell har to clean behind the couch? Nothing, she doesn't speak English.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What would Billy Mays do if he were alive today? Yell.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: A serial killer B: I don't feel comfortable opening the door

thumb_up thumb_down +2

If you don't live in the country, where do you live? The ocean.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels for the loss of their newborn child.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

what did barrack obama say to the jew osama bin ladins a bitch

thumb_up thumb_down -106

What did the priest say to the young African American male? Good to see you again Robert. That community service we did at Morris Park last Friday should give a real boost to the infrastructure of the already stellar community we live in.

thumb_up thumb_down +307

How do you make an idiot laugh? Tell him a mildly funny joke relating to bodily functions, such as defecating or passing gas.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

A man walks into a bar. He meets this attractive female. They later go to his house to have sexual intercourse. However, the man forgot to use a condom. He finds out he got AIDS. He dies twenty years later from his sexually transmitted disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

why did ben perve on the 5 year old girl he is a pedofile

thumb_up thumb_down +53

A traveling salesman breaks down on a rainy night, but spies a farm house. he knocks on the door and the farmer answers. the salesman asks if he can spend the night. the farmer says "sure, but i gotta warn you, i don't have any daughters."

thumb_up thumb_down -81

Three bears take a bath Red bear asks for the shampoo Blue bear wants the soap Wait... That's not a joke, that's a Haiku

thumb_up thumb_down +80

Q:What do they call her? A: They call her love,

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Obama is a good president.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

:(Sneeze) :Bless You :Thank You! :Mention it :Thank You!

thumb_up thumb_down -100

I went seal clubbing the other day but as I was the only one with legs, the dancefloor was quite lonely

thumb_up thumb_down +145

Your mom was so stupid that she went back to school and now she is graduated with a degree.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Guess what? What? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call a plane full of Arab guys? Something not so good.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

uio iu o p uoi p ui o p uio p uio p u io p uio p u io p uio p u iop u ok ghjlk hjkl hjkl jkl hj l hjkl kj l jkl hjkl hjlhjlhjkl l jh ot7843646 56 5 6 356 ghj hkj yj fg tj g d g d fgs dfg f sdgfs gdf gh fg dfhg rthgrth gfh fgh gh df h fgh fd hdf gh f hg et y er y ery ery ery r hfg h fb dgh rtu e tu k ryi k tyu e ry7 6 34 65 3 3 657 f g fb bn dfhs ah w t u y u eytu ye iu r6u uy reytkjnld;kafjgdsfjgsd fg sdf ghjsdfkhj sdfhjs dfjh sdf;hjsdjfh;k dfhjsdf hsfdjh sdfjh sdfjhsjdfdjh sdjf h fdhj dfl;jhsjdf hjs dfjh sdjfh sjdf h;ljsdf;lhjs;dlfjh sdfjh sd;fjh;lsdfjh sdfljh sdflhjs df;ljh sdf;hj ;dsfljhsdl;hj sdf;lhjsd fhj fds;lhjsdf ;lhjs d;lfhj df;hj sdfl;hj;ldfsjh ;lsdfhj sd;flhj fdhjsdf ;lhj sdf;lhjsdf;lhj What what in the buttt????????

thumb_up thumb_down -187

F@ck me in the ass until I say STOP. Before we start, can you please ducktape my mouth?

thumb_up thumb_down +72

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops