How many muslims does it take to screw in a lightbulb. One.

What would Billy Mays do if he were alive today? Yell.

A spanish man, a french man and an italian man sat at a pub. And they realise no one can speak english properly.

What did the priest say to the young African American male? Good to see you again Robert. That community service we did at Morris Park last Friday should give a real boost to the infrastructure of the already stellar community we live in.

Three bears take a bath Red bear asks for the shampoo Blue bear wants the soap Wait... That's not a joke, that's a Haiku

What did the blind man say to his wife? Nothing, for he was mute too

C.U.M. on guys, gay jokes arent funny

How do u tourcheer a fat kid? Make him chase a dounout

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An Irishman walks into a bar. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

Your Mother is so stupid that not only can she not peform basic mathematical sums, but she frequantly makes spelling errors

What does the latin maid does when I tell har to clean behind the couch? Nothing, she doesn't speak English.

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: A serial killer B: I don't feel comfortable opening the door

What doesn't kill you makes you...... A paraplegic

Why doesnt mexico have an olympic team? Because all the mesicans that can run, jump, and swim are already in the U.S.

When Rocky teased Johnny by saying : 'Your momma is so fat , she looks like a hippo.' , He did not know Johnny's mother was suffering a terminal glandular problem combined with an agressive cancer..

Q:what do you call a black bunny with five eyes? A: i don't know I have never heard of such a thing

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they get married and live happy together for the rest of their lives.

What do you call a blonde with one leg? Heather Mills

what did the homeless man get for christmas? nothing.

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can't rhyme Refrigerator

Q:What do they call her? A: They call her love,

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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