The WNBA

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What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

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If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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your moms so fat... she ways like 300 pounds.

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Knock knock? Who's there? Madeline i am back!! :D

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

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Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

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What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

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Why did the man steal 2 watermelons? He was a shoplifter and had a background of crime

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GAY PEOPLE

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

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roses are flowers violets are too violets are purple not fuing blue

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Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

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I used to walk in front of archers, but then I took an arrow to the knee.

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What do airplanes and grapes have in common? They both have wings, except a grape doesn't.

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GRAAAAAAAAAAAR.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? It didn't. It got hit by a car.

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

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What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

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Q:Why did the man get hit by the car? A:He was standing on the road.. ;DDD

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What's the difference between a Jew and a black person? Black people are good at running.

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A man walks into the corner of a table and bruises his leg. The bruise continues to be there for about 3 weeks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops