Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

Why did the archaeologist bury his brother? Because he was dead.

How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

whats round and like a ball a ball

how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

Patiant: Doctor Doctor i feel like a pair of curtains Doctor: ok Patiant: what shall i do ? Doctor: Go how and stop wasting my time

If a tree falls in the woods, and no one is around to hear it - Is there still a woman in the kitchen?

What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

Roses are blue, Roses are red. Give me your money, Or I'll cut off your head.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

Three tomatoes are walking down the street... No wait, they're in my salad.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

My wife and I have been married for ten years. She is a great care-taker and I couldn't be more happy. Then she asked me to make her a sandwich, I went to the kitchen and into the knife drawer...well I think you can guess what happened after that. I cut the meats, and I made her a sandwich.

RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

why did the chicken cross the road Kill yoself

so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

what did the ruler say to the other ruler your a ruler

why did the baby cross the road? i stapled his head to a chicken!

Q: Why was Seven afraid of Eight? A: He was octophobic.

Whats worst than being attacked by a tiger? Being attacked by 2 tigers.

What do you call a man that likes fishsticks? His name

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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