Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the baby cross the street. Because he was attached to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What does Santa get for Christmas? A shitload of work to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How did Hitler die? He saw his gas bill

thumb_up thumb_down +10

My Girlfriend

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A white guy, a mexican, and a terrorist each throw something out of airplane Then they realized it was a bad idea and karma gave them cancer because they may have hurt someone

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Person 1: It's your birthday? Person 2: Yeah! Person 1: Oh.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how do you call a boomerang that does not come back? - a stick

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did the orphan say to the adults wanting to adopt him? i hope u will provide well living conditions because i have lost both of my parents and am forced to live off one meal a day

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the young boy get for Christmas? All his brothers belongings because his brother died

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. what did the refuge from uganda say to his mom when he was riding his bike A. look ma no hands.....

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How did the chicken cross the road? He went to the crosswalk so all the cars had to stop for him.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is red and not there? No tomatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Peas and Corn. Porn., a deer

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops