How do you find a needle in a haystack? You don't, you're too distracted by the pile of adorable kittens next to it

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What do you call a box with a dead Jew in? A coffin.

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why is the room so dark? because the light is not on.

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What do you call a Colombian who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

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really desperate to get laid guy gives out phone number in random places 5802352343 :D

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I'm not as random as you think i salad.

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What is the most effective abstinence plan? There is none.

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there are 2 black guys and a spanish guy in a car. who is driving? a sober, US citizen over the age of 16

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A priest, a rabbi and a captain are in a sinking ship. The rabbi says let's save the children. The captain says f*ck the children. The priest days do we have time.

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you know what they say about people with big feet, they have big feet...

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What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

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Who was worse than Hitler? Justin Bieber

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What's the difference between a white person and a black person? The presence of melanin in their skin, as well as often their socioeconomic and cultural backgrounds.

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What do you call someone who is blind and deaf? Dumb.

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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Why did Billy fall down? Because his brain was replaced with a piece of toast.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Little billy was annoying me But he can't anymore Because now he's dead In a burlap sack In the back of my truck And it's really bloody back there

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Anne Frank.

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From SpongeBob SquarePants "Hey Patrick, wanna know what's funnier than 24??" - SpongeBob "What?" - Patrick " 25!!!!" - SpongeBob There are a lot of things that are funnier than 24 though.

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How did the blond die? Substance abuse

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Why did the woman have sex with the man? Because she is over 18, which is above all of the legal consent ages in the United States.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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