How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

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Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

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I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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What happened to the jew? He got shoved in an oven.

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How do you make a clown cry? You kill his family and chop off his legs.

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Why did the black man die? Why didn't the black man die?

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Teacher- "Sally Sue, a sentence that starts with I, please."\ Sally Sue- "I is..." Teacher- "no, no, Sally Sue, when you start with I, you must follow it with am." Sally Sue- "I am the 9th letter of the alphebet."

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Q. what did the refuge from uganda say to his mom when he was riding his bike A. look ma no hands.....

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Q: Who won the fight of two black guys and a white guy? A: The black and white guy because two is better than one.

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How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You could stab him repeatedly with a box cutter and demand his social security number, but I wouldn't suggest it. He would most likely beat you up.

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Did you hear the one about the blonde who went to the grocery store? She walked in, purchased the items that she specified on her shopping list, then left and went to her daughter's piano recital.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.

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What has 14 eyes, 14 legs, 70 toes and 7 noses... 7 people.

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What do you call a fridge? Dorothy.

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How are you supposed to breath with no air? um jorden sparks you dont?

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the frog fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the monkey,

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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planking.

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Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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