Why did the sponge go to the store? The same reason all sponges go to stores: to be sold to patrons of said store.

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What happen to the boys drink when the girl took a Sharp turn? Nothing the lid was securely fastened.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall underwater? dam

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Why was the white man arrested? He was a rapist.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is large.

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Whats worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog.

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Knock knock who's there? ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dislike me!

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Why was the man arrested? He had brutally stabbed 398 people in a 10 hour period.

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whats the boys name that has no legs no arms and no eyes? lucky

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a big dick, Now suck it you fucking bitch!

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I can't stick my dick in a watermelon.

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Q: What's worse than being fat? A: Getting even fatter than u already are. :o

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only one person get beat up chuck norris. Who you say? Bruce Lee. He got lucky because his eyes were closed.

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The WNBA

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What does a bug do in a telephone booth? Eats yogurt.

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I love my new microwave. It comes with a list that tells just how long to cook things. Now i know how long to cook a baby for

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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Whats the difference........ between a duck?

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Kittens.

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Q: What did the black guy say when he stubbed his toe? A: Ouch.

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Why did the archaeologist bury his brother? Because he was dead.

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What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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