roses are red, violets are violet

newt gingrich

Q: What did Hellen Keller say to the pizza delivery man A: Stop raping me.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

lewis bedford

How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

what is red and looks like blue paint? red paint.

whats the best way to burn calories? Set a fat kid on fire.

What would you do if you're eyes just suddently exploded? You would never see again.

why did the chicken cross the road? why do you care?

cot!

Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

Why couldn't the little boy see anything? It was dark outside.

I do not like the fact that you are linked with the feds.

How many beans are in a soup? Who cares i'm starving, Lets Eat!!!

Women's rights.

Your mum is dead

How Long is a Chinese man.

What do a duck and an elephant have in common? They're both yellow. Except for the elephant.

What did the white man hand to the mexican? His college degree because the mexican had completed all four years of college with a 4.0 GPA.

Two guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would've noticed and avoided it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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