What is the answer to the question of Life, the Universe and Everything? That doesn't make any sense.

I learned a new party trick over the weekend; I swallow a piece of string and it comes out my other end tied! I shit you knot.

Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup? Roast Beef Is Made From A Cow And Is Commonly Sold At Your Local Arby's.Pea Soup Is Made From Peas And No One Really Likes Pea Soup Anyway So Its Not Really Sold Anywhere.

How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

your momma so ugly even she wouldnt date herself.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

I love Ciara!

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What do you get when you cross an African-American, a bird, and ice cream? I don't know.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, The middle one's for you!

Which one is hardest?

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

hi

Why was the woman poor at driving? Because she had not yet passed her driving test.

A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

What should I name my dog?

Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with large genitalia.

A man and a women have a conversation. Man: what's 2 + 2 Woman: four. Man: you're correct.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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