A murderer takes you hostage. He lists three ways that you will die, but he lets you choose your death: 1. A bullet in your head. 2. A knife in your heart. 3. A lethal injection. What do you choose? It doesn't matter. You're dead.

i felt like burning some calories so i lit a fat kid on fire

What is the answer to the question of Life, the Universe and Everything? That doesn't make any sense.

Knock Knock Who's there? It's the mailman delivering your weekly delivery

Three blondes are walking through the woods when the come upon a set of tracks. The blondes stepped away from the tracks to watch the train as it went by.

Why are black guys so tall? Because their knee grows

What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

?2 guys walk into a bar. One gets a beer the other get water.

Roses are red, Violets are blueish, Without Hitler, We'd all be Jewish.

What's funnier than 24? 25.

What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

what's the funniest anti joke? not this one

What's your name? You tell me.

What do you say to the man with lopsided balls? I am terribly sorry, your condition has most certainly left you socially alienated and confused.

Women's rights.

Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because Jimmy has no legs. Why doesn't he have any legs? Because he's a potato.

GAY PEOPLE

What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wanna hear a joke? No.

What did the apple tree say to the farmer? Well! since trees nor apples have the ability to talk I would say the apple tree said nothing. And if the farmer thinks it did say something he should visit the doctors to check his hearing. The End.

"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

what do you call a black guy in a cop car a cop

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems, nice tits

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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