why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

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GONNA

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A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

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Guy 1: there is this really funny knock knock joke. Ok you start. Guy 2: knock knock Guy 1: who's there Guy 2: umm what? I don't know

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memes

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-How do you pull a prank on Helen Keller? -Stick a plunger in the toilet!

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Yo mommas so stupid, she got raped.

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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Why did the dog bark? Who knows, dogs bark for many reasons unknown to humans.

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dead babies

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? Peanut butter is a food paste made primarily from dry roasted peanuts, while jam is a product made with whole fruit, that is cut into pieces or crushed.

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What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

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your mother is so lesbian

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do you know what's so funny? yup

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Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

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Q: how do you tame a dingo? A: Feed it babies

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why couldn't the blonde change the light bulb? because he chose the wrong sized screwdriver from his tool box

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roses are red, violets are not, this poem makes no sense. Bananas

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A black man and a Mexican are hired as day laborers by a white man. The black man cleans the house while the Mexican mows and trims the yard. Both are hard-working and attempting to provide for their families in a down economy.

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was being chased by a pedophile.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

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Why was the monkey sad? Because somebody stole his banana. Why was the monkey happy? Because your parents are dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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