Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was infamous for stealing people's laundry, and 6 was insecure about his bare body

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What is the difference between my elbow and my penis? I Cant lick my elbow

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the man walk into a bar? Well hell I don't know I thought you might.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why is Santa's sack so big? His doctor recently diagnosed him with testicular cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you make a dog drink? You put the dog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How did the fireman get the cat out of the tree? He shot it.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's worse than finding mold on your cheese? Getting Raped

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Whats worse than being gay? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q:What did the cat say to the dog? A: Meow

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb. Two. But it would have to be a very big lightbulb to fit both of them in there.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did Doris want to father children? Because she wanted to have a fry-up with the leftover baby oil

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the dog bark? Who knows, dogs bark for many reasons unknown to humans.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do you call Obama? - the president

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats gay ? you

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

WHATS WORSE THAN THE HOLOCAUST A FLAT TIRE

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

If a wheel falls off a bus whilst travelling down a river, how long does it take to shingle a doghouse? None, because there are no bones in cottage cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops