What is brown and smells? Poop

What do you call a supporter of Barrack Obama? A welfare recipient

Your mama's so fat, she's dead!

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing, walls don't talk.

A Rock accidentally fed a giraffe his fetuses conceived by a box of glue from Jewish Heritage that was made from marker sharpeners that fed paper to elephants while strumming a box of tissues to wipe up the mess from a box of chocolates Forest Gump feeds on your soul while a rock accidentally feeds a giraffe.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree ... Because it was dead

Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

A man walks into a bar.

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "How did you lose your arm?" The amputee doesn't respond because he has been deaf and mute since birth.

"Billy Mays here!" No he's not. He's dead.

What's more dangerous than bungee jumping without a rope? Getting into a car with Ben Colbert.

How many feminist does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to screw it in, the other to suck a dick.

hey bill!

I like the Tsarnaev brothers. They ran the Boston marathon and had a BLAST!

I love Ciara!

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, go ask the chicken.

haha.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms or legs. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

What's big, grey and can't swim? A castle

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms ... Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie

A polish, english and african man each were standing on a skyscraper. The african man jumped and died. The polish and enlgish men called 999.

guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...