Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 took 9 behind an alley and raped her.

Wanna hear a joke the WNBA

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Knock Knock There's no door here, I'm right in front of you.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She was shot Knock knock Who's there? Sally Aren't you dead? Oh yeah K Well imma go be dead now Have fun K

a little girl gets raped

What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

What's the difference between jelly and jam? A: Nothing Really

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

Knock Knock Who's there? The police, your wife just died

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're allergic to flowers So this poem will kill you

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish

Why'd the first koala fall out of the tree? He died. Why'd the second koala fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first koala. Why'd the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game. Why'd the refrigerator fall out of the tree? He thought he was a koala. Why'd the boy fall off the swing? He was hit by 3 koalas and a refrigerator. Why'd the boy fall off his bike? He had no arms or legs

Hey are you from Tennessee, 'cause you have a very nice accent.

Go away.

What did Gene give Carla for Christmas? AIDS

Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

How do you stop a skunk from smelling? Block its nose.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? That she should train harder for her next boxing match, or find a less physically demanding hobby to partake in.

Whats worse than black people : a grimy old woman lickin your toes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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