Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

I told my friend a joke. He didn't laugh, I asked why. He said he was autistic and he does not understand humor.

Why is ya dad ya dad? ........ because of ya cousin

Are you a homophobe? No, I'm cake. ,.

What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

The real Justin Beiber reallly followed me on twitter I deleted my account, set my computer on fire, scattered the ashes and killed myself

What is laying in the corner of the living room of an abandoned house and keeps getting smaller over the years? A decaying baby left there by a crack-head.

Q, Where did Rebecca Black go to eat? A. TGI Fridays

What's the opposite of Them Cox? Deez Nuts

noodles

What's has 4 wheels But ain't a blue car A red car

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? Because they were part of his uniform.

ollie is a fag so are you

what is brown and rhymes with snoop? dr dre

Why did the gorilla leave the zoo? He didn't, he was released.

So a baby seal walks into a club

The chicken crossed the road and died. The end.

What the diffrence between a jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven

milly, milly, milly, cat

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

What was the worst part when 3 Mexican men fell off a cliff? They each were active in the community and had jobs.

Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

Why did Harry go to the store? He was out of food.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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