Type 17 diabetes. Hepatitis R. Pubic Lice. Just Pubic Lice.

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What did the mole say? Nothing

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American Idol

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What do you call a black man in a pumpkin patch? His name is Bill.

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A black man is packing heat while driving his car. He is a police officer

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What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

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So I'm balls deep in this turkey dinner....... then i proceed to ejaculate into it and ruin my family's Thanksgiving along with their perception of me.

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Why is it nice to wear jeans? So people don't see your undies.

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Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

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What's white and comes out of a long black stick? Milk with a long black straw.

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What is 6 plus 9? 15

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

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a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

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What did the Irisman say to the bartender? Don't know? i don't speak Irish?

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What time is it? 12:03 AM

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A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

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A man farted. Another man walked away.

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Why doesn't the chicken wear pants? Beacuse its pecker is on its face.

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Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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What do you call it when a drunk guy puts a tree in his house and then decorates his fireplace with his socks? Christmas (I didn't come up with this)

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baby seal walks into a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops