What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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What's silver and bad for your teeth? A wrench

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What is worse than falling into a pit of needles? being lit on fire and then falling into a pit of needles I imagine

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems don't rhyme, This one doesn't.

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No

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When life gives you: High Fructose Corn Syrup,Citric Acid, Ascorbic Acid,Maltodextrin, Sodium Acid Phosphate, Magnesium Oxide, Calcium Fumarate, Yellow 5, Tocopherol, and less than 2% natural flavours... Make lemonade.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If I see another Joke like this (besides mine) I'll kill you

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co jo kurwa tocza?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

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This is a joke with a difference. It isn't funny.

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What did the little boy with cancer do? He died.

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'THIS IS NOT A JOKE, YOU ARE THE 1000000TH VIEWER'...

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Your doorbell is broken.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I can't stick my dick in a watermelon.

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An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "How did you lose your arm?" The amputee doesn't respond because he has been deaf and mute since birth.

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A man runs into a psychiatrist's office and screams, "You gotta help me doc! I just killed seven people in my office building!"

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What does a bug do in a telephone booth? Eats yogurt.

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A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

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Knock knock Who's there? Forever alone Forever alone who? You.

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a drug dealer was caught and sent to jail. he asks the cop if he could give the cop the drugs for bail. the cop does not except the offer because it is against the law.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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how does a zookeeper build a snowman. same as everyone else

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Q: What's better than a dead baby? A: Knowing who killed it, because then you can report them to your local authorities, thus creating a safer community.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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