Knock Knock There's no door here, I'm right in front of you.

Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was being chased by a pedophile.

a black guy leaves prison

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

Q How do you make pie. A You cook it

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

why did the cow jump over the moon because it was on a high dose of lsd

How did Hitler like his steaks? He didn't like steaks, he was a vegetarian.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

What did the kettle say to the pot? Nothing, inanimate objects can't talk.

abcdHIV this disease is killing me

Q. How did Kit Kat candy bars get their name? A. It was chosen by manufacturer.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

A man yells at the top of the Grand Canyon, "Heyoooooo" He hears His voice echo multiple times. He yells again, "Heyoooooo" This time he hears his echo and a girl yell "heyo" back to him from within the canyon. He looks down. He falls. A mountain goat breaks his fall. The man is so thankful for the goat. He says, " Thank you goat! You saved my life!" The goat then pulls out a gun, and shoots him thrice. The man dies.

A man, a woman, and their son were happily going out for a nice family dinner. The family they ate wasn't so happy.

Oh, I must be hearing things.

Who is the richest clown? You're probably thinking Ronald McDonald but its actually Barack Obama

knock knock who's there? al-Qaeda

How do you make a blond cry? Rape her

What's a mexican's favorite sport? It varies from person to person.

shut up

whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? A. Genetics.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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