A black man and a black woman are in a car, who's driving? The police.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? -call the fire department

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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What do you say to a blind buss driver? You suck

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i wish i was a tree !

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I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. knock knock. who's there? the chicken.

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What happen to the boys drink when the girl took a Sharp turn? Nothing the lid was securely fastened.

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A father gives some golf balls to his son on his son's birthday. The son then goes into the woods with the golf balls, and then comes out without the golf balls. "What did you do with the golf balls?" asks the father. The son says nothing. On Christmas the father gives his son more golf balls, and the son does the same thing. He goes into the woods with them, and leaves without them. Again the father asks what he did with the golf balls, and the son says nothing. This happens for many holidays to come, until the son gets hit by a bus. In the ambulence, the father asks; "One last question ,what did you do with the golf balls?" The son dies

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A priest, a rabbi, and a minister are in a boat in the middle of the lake when a lightning bolt flashes out of the sky and hits them. Fortunately, no one died because only about 10% of those struck are killed.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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How many doctors does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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The horse said "nay."

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is black.

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Roses are red Violets are blue If I see another Joke like this (besides mine) I'll kill you

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when hit multiple times with an axe.

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roses are black, violets are black, im sleeping

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Lol you are really adorable, is more like maybe we will ask you some time, but hey, if you are asking, I mean you are beautiful, insecure, easy to break... I am totally joking by the way, you are completely down to earth, you are sweet, you know what you want, etc etc, hey, and to know what you want in life you got to be confident. Wait a second... I "act" like a savage? Lawl, "streams of OceANUS catchphrase"

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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Statutory Rape.

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what do you call a jewish ladies boob? a joob

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? His family had to sell it in order to put food on the table

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Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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james schmitt whats your last name

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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