Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a mosque.

Roses are grey, violets are grey, im a dog

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere

whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

What's funnier than Mexicans? Whats funny about Mexicans?

A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on gender and environment, but a fully grown, adult, male polar bear weighs from 800 to 1600 pounds.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

There was a blond girl, a redhead, and a brunette. They all walk into a hotel and are granted equally friendly desk service because hair color is not a reliable indicator of intelligence or economic status.

Why couldn't the black man get home? His car broke down, and Goodyear was closed.

What is the difference between a black man and a bike? Bikes are not human beings and therefore cannot experience the ups and downs a human being experiences.

Why should this joke be funny? It shouldn't, because its an anti-joke.

What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

http://www.fotokristall.narod.ru/mov0001.swf

what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

What time is it? 12:03 AM

Ancient Greeks rights

What's wrong with your hand!!!!!???? nothing.

I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...