What's the difference between 2 flies? Their DNA

What's black, white and red all over and can't turn around in a corridor? A nun with a spear through her

Why did Ralph fall off the swing He was distracted because he had a perfect view of the twin towers when 9-11 was happening

What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, cause he didn't make it till Christmas...

What do you call something with no legs or arms swimming in the lake? A fish.

What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

what do you call a muslim driving a plane? a pilot

Q. Why did the mother dissagree with her son's choice in friends? A. Because they were a rather bad influence on him and his grades had gotten considerably worse since they started to hang out.

How did Jesus walk on water? He was Jesus

What do you tell a 500 lb. Sumo wrestler who's eating your food? Stop eating my food.

Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

Feet

You know how geese fly in a V formation and sometimes one side is longer than the other. Do you know why that is? Because there are more geese on that side.

What does a cat sound like when it's being raped by a human? MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWW!

A man came up to me and said," you suck" You know what I told him "YOU SUCK!"

Why was Jimmy afraid of coming out of the closet? He had agoraphobia.

Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

Hi

Last Christmas I gave you my heart but the very next day your body rejected the transfer and you died.

old mcdonald had a farm had..... he now lives in the city

derp

why did the little boy cry? some gang killed his family infront of him.

what's the difference between a pile of shit and a human. a human has a mind, a pile of shit doesn't

if rooster puts egg on roof, in what direction it will roll? There was no egg

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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