What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

Womens rights

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

How do you start up a good conversation? Wanna have a good conversation?

knock knock. who's there? whoer whoer who? whoer you?

What do you get when you cross a horse and a pony? A mule

Why do people often give Jimmy strange looks? Because Jimmy has Down Syndrome

If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

Fuck her

Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF

Q. What's brown and people don't care when they step on it? A. Dirt

Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

What is worse then Hitler? Shelly's Cooking.

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, he didn't my car got to him first.

Slavery

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

Justin Littleton getting laid.

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

What did the drummer say to other drummer? "Hey, I'm a drummer too."

Hello

Whoa! A talking carrot!

ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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