3 guys and 2 women walk into a bar and sat down........... good to see both sex`s were welcome in the bar

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1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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Jack and Jill climb a tall hill to get some water from the well for there farther who has been working in the fields. Jack trips and hits his hell on a rock and Jill promptly calls 911 and stays with him until help arrives.

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Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

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What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

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Whats Asian and longer than 2 inches? chopsticks.

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how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

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Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

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A man is walking on a beach when he finds a golden lamp. He rubs it and a genie comes out. The genie tells the man he will grant three wishes. The man wastes his wishes on material goods that do not bring him happiness.

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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A polish, english and african man each were standing on a skyscraper. The african man jumped and died. The polish and enlgish men called 999.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Leave the plunger in her toilet with the handle greased.

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How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

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Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

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What's worse than being named Troy Merrill? Being Black.

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What is the difference between a baby and a tampoline? You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

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Why did video kill the radio star? He slept with videos wife.

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How do you stop someone from dying of cancer? Shoot them in the head.

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I dislike old people.

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"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

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why does everyone hate chris. cause he's a douchebag.

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I'm not as random as you think i salad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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