What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

The WNBA

Q:What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? A: It varies. But most dental offices are open for service between 8am and 4pm

Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why the second koala fall out of the tree? because it was hit by the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? because it thought it was a game.

Q:whats the easiest way to get crabs? A:at your local seafood market.

Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was infamous for stealing people's laundry, and 6 was insecure about his bare body

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

Why was the black man sad? People were frequently talking and whispering about his dark colouring behind his back. Also he had no legs.

What was the latino gardener doing? Working hard to keep his job in these tough economic times.

When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

Whats the difference between a horse and a pile of wheat? Its a pile of wheat.

A man walks into a bar. He asks the bartender for a glass of milk. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve milk here.

What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing. He's a mute.

How did the poor young women get Aids? She got raped.

Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

KEVIN HART

A black man walks into a bar. the bartender ask what he wants to drink. the black man responds , "i will have one beer please". so the bartender gives it to him and says have a nice day.

A cat and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "it's refreshing to see perennial enemies enjoying each others company".

A man walks into a bar... ...because he is blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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