There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

LOL i just pissed on Hitlers grave! Shoudn't killed the Jews BITCH!

What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

Why are you here? Because i'm not over there!

How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

What's funny and arousing? This joke.

Q:How do you turn off a Jewish Lamp? A: You press the Auschwitz.

Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

What do you call a black Arnold Schwarzenegger? Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Why the worker did not come to work? Because he died!

My sister has to take a dump

Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

How do you make a bowl of cheese? First you get a bowl. Then insert the cheese.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman.

guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

what's hard and pink going in a soft and wet coming out Gum

What's your name? You tell me.

What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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